At about 11pm at night on Friday the 13th, twelve students ended up flushing cyanide pills down the toilet on the lower levels of the school; while this may have been deemed a harmless prank by the students, what started off as “harmless” instantly spiraled into disaster when said toilet ended up exploding, causing water to instantly flood the entire bathroom and flow into the hallway, causing three bystanding students to drown within minutes and destroy all of the brand new drywall and layered paint that the construction crew had just laid down.
Now, said construction crew is suing Harford Schools for the amount of two dollars ($2), since only two of their crewmates drowned in the destruction. But, on the other hand, parents of student “Dean Thomas” are suing Harford Schools for the amount of eight million six hundred seventy five thousand three hundred and nine dollars ($8,675,309).
All in all, the damage was able to be quickly fixed, along with the bodies of the deceased being buried under the haunted redwood tree right outside of Harford Tech property. Us at the newspaper can only hope that those reading this article won’t go and try to dig up these bodies, since the deceased deserve to rest in piece…BUT if you do want to pay your respects, you must go onto the trails right behind the soccer field, head back into the forest for a half-mile, find the redwood tree (which is blue in color, mind you), and spin around in a circle three times while singing “St. Elmo’s Fire”. We hope that this helps.
Hopefully at this point you would realize that there was no way in God’s name that this story has happened, and hopefully at this point you would realize that this story was posted on April 1st, so, you know what that means…….
Hope you enjoyed this waste of three minutes!!!!!!!!
